No, no, don’t get upset with me, apparently it’s true.
You see, I’ve got one of those new-fangled iPhone things, and downloaded an application – Architecture – by two Dutch blokes Bas Berck and Vincent Verwell, at a software company called Makayama. Yes, I know, sounds Japanese, even if it is all just double dutch. But don’t rush off and get it. Not yet. Because it is the:
Thing is, you turn it on to look for the nearest piece of modern architecture, and things look ominous. It asks if it can use your current location, and as the CIA aren’t after me yet, I say OK. It tells me that it can pinpoint me with accuracy to the nearest 500m, which is OK, as if they try to get me, they might get that old lady Mrs Clusterfutt up the road instead.
But then it says that the nearest city is “Sidney” and even there it appears there is only one building in the town – the Sydney Opera House. Spelling guys, spelling! I know it is engrish and all, but really, it is a major city. Surely you’ve heard of it before? Helpfully, it tells me that I am 2233 km away from there.
Then to add insult to injury, it tells me that the next nearest building of modern architectural worth after that is the Petronas Towers, and they’re a mere 8869.9 km away.
And so it goes.
So, you see, there really is no architecture in New Zealand.
What these guys need is a local NZ based partner…..
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I’ve always suspected this – all those people who thought that Ian Athfield, Ernst Plischke, Bill Alington, Jim Beard and Roger Walker had done something interesting in their buildings were clearly wrong …; ha, ha just kidding – but seriously an app that reconstructed demo-ed buildings could be just as much fun …
The application description does say that you can: “Travel to any place in the world and this guide will tell you, where the most interesting buildings around you are located. It will tell you the story behind the building and the architect, display two pictures for every project, and gives you walking or driving directions…. …This careful selection of the major wonders of 20th and 21st century spans traditions throughout the world, from Le Corbusier to the latest Pritzker Prize winners. From the renowned, famous icons to the hidden architectural gems.”
So that’s it then. We have no icons – I can probably agree with that – but no gems either? Surely not.